And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Its about making memories worth repressing
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
