Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
