The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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