I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Slut skills are useful in every country.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
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