I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize