The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
