You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
