Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize
