Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
