so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
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