that's an acceptable place to lick
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
There's always time for handjobs
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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