can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
