hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
