bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
