another moral hangover. fuck.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I party with great urgency now.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
