One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
