I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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