that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
