FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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