i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
