And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
