her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize
