Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Fuck appropriateness.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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