Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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