I'm really into asian looking animals
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
