At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
