Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
