Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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