So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
