She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Randomize
