Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
