WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
