How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
sarcasm needs its own font
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
