with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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