ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
