You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
