Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
