They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I want a musical about memes.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
