Your tits are I can't wait for
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I enjoy the company of your penis
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
