My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
