I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
