i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
You are a genius and a whore.
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