My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
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