At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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