arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
