Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Randomize
