you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
