Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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