Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
