She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize