just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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